My heart is racing, and I feel that empty longing sensation in my stomach like something was taken from me. It must be 3 a.m. again. Did I say or post something too personal yesterday? Was I too much? Was I hiding in my cocoon all day not doing enough for the world? Was I doing too much activism again? Protesting again. Too much? Not enough?
Nauseous and hot. My mind runs through the day and evening before as if someone else is lying in this body right now shaming me for my existence. Did I allow too much freedom for the kids? Did they wash their hands after going outside? Did they really stay six-feet apart? Am I numbing myself when I help others overcome addiction?